Exploring my gifts…

Today I spent the day with people I do not know, and two I have met briefly.  We explored our Gifts from God.  It was all very exciting, and informative. At the same time very humbling, and terrifying.  God does expect a return on those gifts for HIS glory. So many of mine, have laid untouched for a year. So its quite an understatement to say , “God has lit a fire under my butt”..but HE has.  For that I am grateful.  Also very repentant.

Would we allow any other gift to lay in a corner and not open it? not use it? not show some kind of excitement?

While thinking of how much of a disappointment I am to HIM, I realized that something else was going on in this room…

I was learning and seeing with my own eyes how each person has gifts that are not all the same, and we compliment each other very well. There was no pride or arrogance.  Unity filled the room.  Then HE nudged me… “you love them, don’t you? you are loving the body of Christ”  oh! i have prayed for that so long, and thought i would never sense that in a structured environment.

I love HIM so! Thankful for the gifts HE has given to me, and praying that I will grow into each one of them and use them for HIS glory.  HE always knows what I need, and always knows exactly how to encourage me!

Father God, you know the plans you have for me.  At times it terrifies me at all you have entrusted to me. Realizing that it because  I fear failing you. But You do not fail me.  Please help me to take my place in Your body, using the gifts you have given me, and overcoming the fears that I have. I love you LORD, and I am lifting up my gifts to you for your glory.  As you have said it will be…so will it be. Your Princess who is shaking her head, taking deep breaths as I dive in deeper…

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No longer a broken smile

Lately my life has not been its norm.  I’ve been going through surgeries to undo some damage that I have walked through most of life with, and some from the drug abuse I did that eased the pain of the abuse, and the spiral just continued.  It got to the point where my health was seriously at stake, and I no longer could ignore it.  So some inflicted on me, some self inflicted.  This has been my summer of pain. Very intense. My smile was broken.

I want to share with you how awesome our GOD is!  Through this summer, HE has brought me beautiful people who do not know me, yet they pray for me, and I know it carried me through.  HE brought friends who do know me, closer to me.  HE placed me in front of my computer and provided so many good things for me to read and fill my mind. And the most precious thing to my heart…online church.  God does love HIS children, and although the enemy kicked me every inch of the way this summer, the LORD pulled me closer, and overwhelmed me with the way HE loves us!

Today I looked in the mirror, and some thing has definitely changed.  My mouth has been reconstructed on the inside, and my smile is new to me.  The damage and abuse that I went through as a small child through to young adult life had taken the smile that GOD had given me.  This may not mean much to anyone but me, and thats okay…but I rejoice in how HE gives back what the enemy has taken…even something so small as a smile.  I thank HIM for caring so much about the little things in our lives, and for giving me my hubs that felt my smile was worth every penny it cost.  Thanking GOD for providing that income as well.  God is good, HE does take the bad and make it good, and HE is the lifter of my head!

Taking Some Ground, In JESUS name!

This morning was like any other Saturday morning, heading out to get food for hungry growing children!  In the car stereo, was Travis Cottrell~Unashamed Love. Of course, it needed to go UP! LOUDER!  in a matter of moments he escorted me right into the throne room, where I needed to be so desperately. More than I knew.  As Worship just filled my Saturn, the presence of the LORD was strong.  Been wondering lately, how does one love so deeply the LORD, and over time it seems to become natural.  HE is so NOT natural, HE is supernatural, there is no way that we should ever just stop jumping up and down over what HE has done and is doing.

The last few years, we have been through some things that only God can save us from. And save us HE did. But the scars have been deep, and on occasion painfully reminding.  We have come through Immorality/pornography, miscarriages, and a broken family to a whole family. God has moved in ways that are incomprehensible, and still knowing that HE has done these things.  I don’t know what you have been through, but I know when God moves HIS hand and saves you…you just can’t shut up about it! This is where the enemy put me in bondage again…

God moved on my heart to teach women, and I did for several years.  I live in a area where religious Bible teaching is prominent. Once they hear my testimony of where I have been and what Jesus has saved me from, the shots begin.  Some how, the enemy used them to sit me down, to lower my hands in praise, and to believe that I should just be happy that God has brought me into HIS family, but there really is no place among them.  How I tried to become part of one family after another, and the same thing happened again..

After months of no worshipping any where, God lead me Lifes Changed by Christ. Amazing.  Still there has been this darkness lurking around me..part of the legalism that bound me raced through my mind..”there is unrepentant sin..this is as good as it gets,..just be glad you have been saved from hell…no one wants to hear you…”  While pondering these things I have decided….

God will speak to my heart about what is wrong, as long as i keep my heart open to HIM! I did need some repentance, seems that I have been angry with GOD for bringing out of all the abuse in my life to abuse me again in Jesus name…

Then it happened! my worship, my freedom from the legalistic bonds that were trying to suffocate me. HE did not save me from the pit to sit me in the back seat or to allow self righteous people to make me hang my head yet again. NO that is not my GOD, and IN JESUS NAME, I am taking back the ground that my DADDY gave to me..Thank you Jesus for breaking through again and again.. Thank you for Beth Moore who taught me your Truth, and how to look into it my self, and thank you for Travis who taught me how to sing your praises from my heart.

Revive- Chorus of the Saints

Can’t find a good version of this song, or better video, or lyrics..YET it is in my head all week..so I thought I would share it with you all. Have a great Sunday!! God is faithful!, and that alone is the Chorus of the Saints…don’t we need to be reminded of that…I did! Peace and Love!

Share encourgement

Today, i am wanting to just hear encouragement..What is God doing in your life?  What one thing has happened today to just show that HE cares for you? (even if you just have the pleasure of eating today, remember that many around the world will not eat today..so that is a blessing and a wonderful thing that shows HIS provision for you).

Worship with me..Celebrate Mercy