My King, my healer…

Isaiah 57: 18,19(NLT)

18 I have seen what they do,
but I will heal them anyway!
I will lead them.
I will comfort those who mourn,

19 bringing words of praise to their lips.
May they have abundant peace, both near and far,”
says the Lord, who heals them.

 

So many questions, so many things on my mind, so many condemnations plaguing me.   God knows every single thing I’ve ever done, including the thoughts that were less than pleasing to Him. Standing in Awe of how HE works and leads me to exactly what I need to come to closer to Him. That has been my prayer, as well as the reason for my silence on FB/twitter.

HE brought me back to a study HE prompted me to dig into…still stuck and wondering and praying…”I know you want me to know this, I just can’t pull it together”.  Just the next day, I came across a study I worked through about 6 years ago. The title resonated with me, “Father, revive my heart…” So started working on that again…writing out my answers fresh and dating them, so i could see a difference in me from the time that past.  HE showed me how much I have grown through the years, and how much pride HE has already taken away from me (still a ways to go tho).

My original study, writing my own study, on the “Holy Spirit”. The second page of “revive my heart” .. “Holy Spirit”…Church today..”we are starting a new study “Holy Spirit”.   I absolutely love where He has led me to, and the way works to bring me closer…

HE knows what i did, and HE is going to heal me anyway! HE is going to lead me, and put HIS praise on my lips..I think I know how the woman at the well felt.

Resting tonight in His love for me, Knowing that healing is very close, believing that knowing HIM in God the Spirit is my missing link to pulling this faith walk together.  Last weekend, I heard HIM say “no FB”, I had to be obedient. This week, has been overwhelming in revelations, and causing me to rejoice and tremble at the same time.  My Holy, Supreme God is once again directing my steps…oh how HE loves..

 

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Upside down, Inside out

remembering when God turned my world upside down and inside out for my good…remembering how unsettling at times that was…didn’t know at that time that God would have to do that to me over again….and who knows? maybe several more times in my life…

About eight years ago, the path i was on…nothing short of incredible…three years ago, a mentor led me into a pit that scarred me in ways no one will ever know, but God knows.  Since then, it seems to be very easy for me to fall into my old life style at a drop of a hat!  I don’t let people very close to me, until i am pulling away into my seclusion that feels like home to me.

Thought that was all behind me.  Only to wake up recently and realize I live there again…

God is once again turning my heart, my life upside down and inside out, for my own good, and to bring HIM glory. Is it painful..yes.  Acceptance and affirmation have become idols, and they need to go…strange that when they let me down (and of course they will) my emotions become upset with God. Realize this now… I need to spend time in the word every day, and i need to listen to good praise music, i need to spend time in conversation with HIM…these are only my convictions, i don’t expect them to be yours.  My scars have been reopened, and wounds can only be healed HIS wounds, and who i am can only be found in HIM.

Its going to be worth it, and i have to believe that.